I told. . .

So. . .last post I mentioned that I hadn't told any coworkers at the "new" job about my past. Well, it finally came time to tell someone. I kind of had to to explain a situation which I otherwise would have had to explain with some statement like "well, it just is".

So, the usual happened. He got all emotional and started repeatedly telling me he's sorry. Ok, I understand and accept his condolences, but really it's going on 6 years now. It's this reaction I try to avoid. People simply don't understand how to respond. This is now a fact of my life. I kind of wish they would react like they do when I tell them my address or phone number, since it's a fact just like those are. I know they can't. I understand it. I go through the same feelings in similar situations. But, I now work hard to make it a single, sincere, wish of condolences and then leave it. It's not easy to do, it never feels adequate, but being on this side I know it's what they need.

I wonder how much longer until I can tell people and not have them freak. How much longer until it doesn't color their view of me. How much longer until they can treat it like a fact of my life.

How much longer until I can really just do that. . .